#incorrect parks and rec

[yumkiwidelicious]

Logan: Louise is the best, but she’s 9. When Louise was born I was already in first grade, which means if we were friends back then I woulda been hanging out with a baby! I don't know anything about infant care…Oh my god, I coulda killed her…

[djcanipe99]

Marcus: Which one of you is George o malley,Spencer Reid ,Shawn Spencer,Neal caffery,Andy Dwyer ,Mike Ross jake peralta and Sheldon copper

George,Spencer ,Shawn ,Neal ,Andy mike ,jake and Sheldon : Oh, that's me.

Marcus: Wait a second... is your great grandfather father Indiana Jones

George,Spencer ,Shawn ,Neal ,Andy mike ,jake and Sheldon : nervously)Yes.

Marcus : You poor bastard!

[stephreynaart]

Was never super into the reverse falls au, don’t know all the details, and not interested

But I always imagined the gleeful twins being exactly like the Saperstein Twins from Parks and Rec

[aprill-99]

*After the Gauntlet.*

Amber: “You can’t do that!”

Violet: “Not to worry, I have a permit.”

Dain: “This just says ‘I can do what I want-’”

Xaden: “-And she can. 10/10. 5 Stars.”

[dontremembermejust]

Agatha: Aw, you have a crush on me!

Rio: We’re married.

Agatha: Still…

[fandomnerd9602]

Natasha: I couldn’t believe the crush Wanda had on Y/N…

Y/N: (laughs) oh baby you had a crush on me? How embarrassing!

Wanda: we’re married

Y/N: (laughs) still

Natasha: of course that was nothing compared to the crush Y/N had on Wanda.

Y/N:

Wanda: (laughs) how embarrassing!

For @lifespectator

[incorrectmcuquotess]

Wade introducing Logan to his friends for the first time

Wade: Sorry we're late. I had to wait on my boyfriend to finish eating breakfast. We had dinner last night and breakfast this morning. What were we doing in between? Sex stuff.

Logan: You guys know Wade really well so I don't have to apologize for his behavior, right?

[ammdakin]

No, sir. Definitely not.

(Quote Source: Parks and rec)

p.7 of my silly OFMD fanarts 🏴‍☠️💕

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

Raph: If there is credit to take, I will humbly take it.

Raph: But if there is blame, it’s Leo’s fault.

[incorrectstarwarsquotess]

Anakin: If there is credit to take, I will humbly take it. But if there is blame, it’s Obi-Wan’s fault.

[incorrectbatfam]

Barbara: Why would I want you as my assistant?

Kory: I will work for you. I’ll be on you 24/7. I’ll be like your family. I’m here when you get here in the morning, and sure enough, I’ll be there tucking you into bed at night. Don’t worry, it’s not gay. Do we have questions?

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Clint: How long have you been sleeping with Natasha?

Y/N: What

Y/N: I don’t even get…

Y/N: Why would I…

Y/N: I’ve never had sex with anyone. Anywhere.

Y/N: It’s none of your…

Y/N: You have the nerve, the audacity

Y/N: And how do I know, frankly, that YOU’RE not sleeping with her?

Y/N: Maybe you are. Maybe you’re trying to throw me off!

Y/N: Check and mate.

[fos-tis-zois]

Atsumu: Omi-kun you're so cool when you spike!! Sakusa: Thanks, Osamu. ~few mins later~ Hinata: Why is Atsumu-san crying? Sakusa: I called him by his brother's name. Hinata: W-why? Sakusa: When people get too chummy with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don’t really care about them. Hinata: oh... Sakusa: You don't need to worry Hinata. Hinata: :D Bokuto: And meeee Sakusa???? Sakusa: Of course Atsumu. Bokuto: 😭

[writersglock]

Commander Fox: Alright, who broke my favourite mug?

Cody: It wasn't me.

Rex: I would never do that.

Wolffe: it was probably Cody.

A little while later...

Fox: I broke it. I saw Emperor Palpatine using it, and so I immediately destroyed it.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

vaggie the hotel manager uses her position and assumed no-nonsense-ness for evil and chaos bc she can

Vaggie: “So.”

Vaggie: “Who broke it?”

Hotel Crew: *stares in silence at the obliterated coffee machine*

Vaggie: “I’m not mad. I just wanna know.”

Charlie: “…..”

Charlie: “-I did, I broke-”

Vaggie: “-no. No, you didn’t sweetie.”

Charlie: (huffs)

Vaggie: “Angel Dust?”

Angel Dust: “Don’ look at me, toots! Look at Husk.”

Husk: “What? I didn’t fucking break it?”

Angel Dust: “Weird. How’d you even know it was broken?”

Husk: “Because it’s sitting right the fuck in front of us, and it’s broken.”

Angel Dust: (leans down) (smirks in his face) “Suspicious~”

Husk: (angry cat noise) “No the fuck it’s not???”

Sir Pentious: “If- if- if it matterssss- probably not, but… Niffty WASSSS the lassst one to ussse it.”

Niffty: (giggling) “LIAR I DON’T EVEN DRINK THAT CRAP!”

Sir Pentious: “Oh. Ah, um, well then- what WERE you doing by the coffee cart earlier?”

Niffty: “I use the hot water to boil insets alive in- everyone knows that, SNAKEY.” (holds up coffee cup of dead drowned bugs)

Sir Pentious: (recoils hissing in HORROR)

Charlie: “Okay- OKAY! Let’s not fight, I broke it, let me pay for it Vaggie.”

Vaggie: “Babe, no. Who broke it?”

Hotel Crew: *dead silence*

Husk: “….”

Husk: “…Vaggie. Alastor’s been awfully fucking quiet…”

Alastor: (irate dial tuning sound) “REALLY?”

Husk: “Yeah, really-”

Alasator: “OH HO HOW DARE-”

Hotel Crew: *bursts into squabbling*

Vaggie: (watching)

Vaggie: (shit liar) “I broke it. It burned Charlie’s hand earlier, so I punched it.”

Hotel Crew: *still arguing aren’t listening*

Vaggie: (smirks)

[fandomnerd9602]

Y/N approaches Wanda at the annual Avengers costume party…

Y/N: so what are you dressed as?

Wanda: the Scarlet Witch, mistress of all magic. And you?

Y/N: a Shield agent. I borrowed it from Coulson…gotta be honest i thought your costume would be a little sluttier-

Wanda playfully slaps them…

Wanda: how dare you!

She gives a smirk and wink before sauntering off…

Y/N: (smiles) nice!

Y/N quickly follows her…